I have a theory

Almost every girl or woman I meet seems to have PCOS. Every other woman I meet is undergoing IVF or is struggling to conceive. Makes me wonder what’s really going on? Yes, I understand lifestyle and stress. But when it starts to become a common story we need to look a little deeper into our core mindsets and life choices.

So here’s my theory… and let me just say I’m restricting this to city girls or girls raised in urban settings. We girls are raised to have jobs and even careers. We are educated and taught that we must be financially independent. Yes, there’s still the “don’t speak so loudly, you are girl” or “don’t sit like that, you are a girl” conversations, but the whole we are equal to boys and can follow our dreams is taught to us in theory.  Then we grow up and become “marriageable age”. Now we are asked to choose between our relationship and our career. At this time, we are told, “everyone compromises. You can’t have it all.” And then the thought of having a child and taking on that responsibility begins to dawn upon us. Because that’s the natural next step, right?

Don’t hold me by this time line… it’s a general gist of life states we girls go through. Somewhere between figuring out our career and getting married which is usually in our 20s many of us are being diagnosed with PCOS. A bunch of us are getting diagnosed in our late teens as well. But could this inner conflict that we have these multiple roles to balance and that we will have to sacrifice some of our dreams be the root of our ovaries protesting?

The ovaries, the womb sit in the Sacral Chakra energy. The Chakra that is governed by the element of water. It is about flowing through life. It’s the seat of our emotions and hence flowing through our emotions without getting stuck on or trapped by any particular emotion. The Sacral Chakra is also our seat of creation, literally and figuratively. When we want to create something in our lives whether it is work or relationship or an aspiration, the emotions to sow the seeds of intention are churned in our Sacral Chakra. The Sacral Chakra holds the sacred feminine energy; it’s the seat of gender identity – as configured by Spirit and as dictated by conditioning. Guilt and shame are the shackles that bind us in this Chakra. So could it be then that we are all so overburdened by guilt for the choices we as women make that it is throwing our organs into this state of imbalance? Could PCOS be a manifestation of us rejecting or resisting aspects of our being, our own essence?

This constant noise in our head that tells us we will have to give up a dream to enjoy another or that we can’t have it all or that we will eventually be restricted in the way we choose to live… could this be the mindset we must counter to emotionally support our body to heal and even prevent PCOS?

“I am afraid that becoming a mother will mean I will have to give up my career.” A few months ago, a client of mine said this to me and it struck me that we  may be a generation of women who are unknowingly rejecting our  womb. She is not the first client I’ve had who despite being an absolutely healthy woman with a healthy womb and required parameters is undergoing IVF and yet not being able to conceive.

Any change comes with a constant echo of fear and we must acknowledge and  address those voices within. Struggling to silence them or resisting  the truth that’s coming through only causes the downward spiral to  speed up. Life is transient and our truths change as we work on our goals and desires. We go through different phases and that’s a part of this life cycle. But what makes it so difficult for us to believe we can juggle all the balls? Why are we afraid to drop one of those… Will our world really shatter if we have outgrown one aspect or are prioritising a different aspect?

What I’m trying to communicate is that we have this black & white view of things; we are fatalistic in our thinking. It’s this or that. It’s like this or like that. I can have it this way or that way. If I want this I have to give up that… so what if I worked so hard to build that. What is conversation of resistance and rejection that we are constantly having with ourselves?

I don’t know if there’s a formula like solution for us women to implement yet. But I do know changing the way we think about our lives and choices can change the way our bodies are reacting.

Here’s one more perspective and I got this from an article I read about PCOS. According to certain studies over the next few decades or generations, PCOS will become a genetic aspect passed on from mother to child, a lot like Type 1 diabetes which can be hereditary. And this got me thinking. We are getting married later than our parents did; we are having children way later as well obviously. But for generations our body clock was tuned to function to a certain age-driven timeline. These crazy lifestyles, stress levels and complete change in timings, well I’m not sure our bodies got the memo to upgrade or adapt.

So can a change in how we think about having children, building a career, balancing work, relationships and life help us women support our bodies better? Could a shift in mindset help recover from PCOS? And which by the way could mean that it remains dormant because there’s no cure for it, there’s only managing symptoms so far. Could we reconfigure our bodies to nurture and nourish our wombs to be able to conceive babies at an older age than our mothers without medical support? Is there a way we can truly embrace our life’s choices?

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